If I meant this, I wouldn’t say it.

John Mayer has written another ridiculous song. Here are some of the lyrics:

Take all of your wasted honor.
Every little past frustration.
Take all of your so called problems,
Better put ‘em in quotations.

Let’s skip ahead to my favorite part:

It’s better to say too much, than never to say what you need to say again.

Here are the problems with the lyrics to this song (I am under-qualified to discuss the problems with the music, but I kind of feel that they speak for themselves):

1. “It’s better to say too much” is almost never true. In fact, “A prudent man keeps his knowledge to himself, but the heart of fools blurts out folly.” (Proverbs 12:23) If I’m going to err in any direction, I hope to err in the opposite. Except right now, of course.

2. This song already exists. Be assured that God is listening and that this is sufficient.

3. If these are only “so called problems,” then I don’t want to hear about them. No offense.

4. The same goes for your every little past frustration. In fact, “He who conceals his hatred has lying lips, and whoever spreads slander is a fool.” (Prov 10:18) It is worthwhile to consider the options you’re left with. Maybe the problem is with your thoughts.

5. Mr. Mayer does not address the issue of efficiency. At first, the song sounded to me like a call for forthright speech– you know, say it already and be done with it. But his repeating “Say what you need to say” over forty times (in succession) does more to undermine his message than it does to drive it home. Is he stalling? Is he stuttering? Is this little imperative all he needed to say? If so, then isn’t once sufficient? We could have stopped at the song’s title.

The appeal of the song is obvious. It’s empowering. It’s all about the speaker’s needs and how they can be most immediately satisfied. The listener has no power and is given no consideration. Will what I’m going to say offend you, humiliate you, or make you wish you were dead? Ha! You’re lucky I even bothered to ask!

You could write a similar song from the perspective of the listener. It might go like this:

Take all of your wasted effort.
Every little thing you tried.
Take all of your disappointment,
And bottle it up inside.

Except then everyone would say, “Wow, John Mayer sure is a big jerk.”

This does not even consider the damage done to the careless speaker. Is saying everything you want to say even any healthier than withholding ninety percent of it? I’ve never seen any actual proof that talking about your problems makes them go away. And just feeling better is not the same as being cured. I think we all remember that episode of Little House on the Prairie with the traveling “doctor” and his placebos. Mrs. Olson could have died if Doc Baker hadn’t stepped in!

Because John Mayer has a smooth and comforting way of saying things, and because he makes it seem natural to do as he suggests, and because, in truth, our nature is wicked and would very much like to do as he suggests, his poisonous lyrics will affect substantially more people than would the lyrics of a really obviously profane song. Because it’s almost flavorless, you can sit there ingesting Mayerian philosophy for hours and hours and never notice what it’s doing to you. But that doesn’t mean it’s not doing anything. Consider that “by your words you will be acquitted, and by your words you will be condemned,” (Matthew 12:37) and decide which you would prefer.